You Know What's Bullshit? Printers.

A great rant on printers. I feel there's more that could be mined from this well. I hate printers.
sholesays...

correction; inkjet printers are bullshit
only thing wrong with laser printers is the buying prize, but it also lasts longer
ink doesn't dry out on it's own like on inkjets
doesn't get stuck as often due to no moving parts on paper surface
drivers and general mechanical functionality don't suck as bad due to less complex mechanics
doesn't take fucking 30 minutes to install a new cartridge
used to install stuff like printers for a living for a while and hated anyone who got an inkjet cos it took so goddamn long to set up and then there still often was trouble with the inks - or drivers - or the mechanical parts being buggy or plain faulty
it took all of three minutes to unpack a laser, install drivers and plug it in

spoco2says...

You know, I'm not going to upvote this.

HIS printer is shit, and all of these things go with HIS printer. mine has never printed out instructions to do anything, and if it's low on an ink, it'll tell you but it won't stop you printing.

And getting the right ink for your printer is as simple as getting the one that says your printer model number on the box... easy.

Yes there are plenty of things that suck a great deal about printers, but the ones he lists here are far from universal.

Deanosays...

Yeah his issues are with inkjets but I feel the pain of dealing with printers generally. He should have mentioned incredibly poor UI design, inexplicable buttons and lights and poor manuals.

But inkjets were always a ripoff. Lasers are a much better bet and in my experience are good value for money.

videosiftbannedmesays...

So true. One thing he forgot was the part about printer drivers. 325MB for a fucking printer driver? Are you high? And then you get to sit there and go through screen after screen after screen as it verifies the download, then unpacks it, then verifies the unpacking, then installs itself like a cancer into your OS, with all it's assorted image viewers (which steal your associations), print cartridge monitors, bells, whistles, bedsprings, gila monsters and other errata.

FEAD Optimizer my ass....

(huffs, pants and throws arms around, stomping)

Yeah...I do tech for living, can't ya tell?

Croccydilesays...

Well he does have a point about colour printers being silly refusing to print just in black when your missing one of the other colours. I have run across far too many of those where there is plenty of black (even in laser printers) but if your missing one of the others? Sorry, printer shuts down completely till you fill in the blanks.

Especially annoying when you have high end colour laser printers where replacing all four carts of CMYK = over $1000 (!)

alizarinsays...

The biggest bullshit about inkjets is that their economic model is based on selling you ink and cripling ways for you to use generics or do stuff like just print black.

sillmasays...

one can get a decent black only 15ppm laser printer dirt cheap nowadays(paid 49€ myself, probably even cheaper in USA and, well, generally anywhere else than in Finland), and it has yet to malfunction after couple of thousand pages.(cartridges go for the same price as the printer as well, and pack 'ink' for around 1500 pages).

And yeah, must agree with him on the inkjets. They're utter crap.

DonanFearsays...

Cheap inkjets are horrible, but try printing photos with a laser printer...
And a lot of color laser printers print tracking dots on every page you print. Yay!

Cheap b/w laser printers are ok, but if you need color don't buy the cheapest inkjet printer/scanner/fax/toaster/radio all-in-one POS you find, spend a little extra cash on a proper inkjet printer (without a ton of built-in crap).

HollywoodBobsays...

Also if replacing inkjet cartridges pisses you off get a continuous inking system. They're about the cost of a replacing all your colors and you'll never have to do more than refill the tanks once a year.

Winstonfield_Pennypackersays...

I tend to agree that inkjet printers are pretty frustrating. I have an old HP inkjet and the cartridges are pretty hard to find unless I go to a big office store like OfficeMax. And even then they are hidden in a dizzying array of about FORTY different HP inkjet cartridges. HP invents some new printer once every 2 or 3 years, and creates an entirely different cartridge for each one. That's pretty lousy company policy.

I haven't had the test page print issue the AVGN ran into here, but I sure do hate HP's DRIVERS. HP drivers are the most ungodly, bulky, massive, unwieldy, invasive drivers I think I've ever seen for ANYTHING - let alone for printers. Even the notoriously bulky 3d video card drivers aren't as nasty. And the download times from HP's website are the pits.

So you have to download 200+ MB drivers (when 2KB would be plenty) on a 1KBPS server. And 99.9999999% of the download is just a crappy, clunky, badly designed user interface. HP printers are nice engineering, but their software is about the worst on the planet.

darkpaw02says...

I have that exact model, Deskjet F380, and what that tells me is that this guy is an idiot who doesn't know how to use his printer.

He has the printing options set to use the colour cartridge, so of course it will complain if it's out of ink. If you choose "black cartridge" for plain text it doesn't care about the colour inks.

And the page that prints out is to align the print heads automatically. It prints only when you have opened the flap to swap cartridges, you then put it in the scanner and press scan, so the printer can check its own output and adjust itself. This does seem to work quite well.

PHJFsays...

You know what's bullshit about printers? Selling the printer without any connectivity cables. WTF. Then basically any brick and mortar store charging $25 for a 3' USB cable.

r10ksays...

325MB for a fucking printer driver?


Now that's funny... the old CD sized HP printer driver. I can't begin to imagine how they pulled that one off.

radxsays...

Printers rank #2 on my list of peripherals I destroyed the most of, only beaten by keyboards. "Respect ma authoritay!" and a broom were my tools of choice in handling printers lately.

osama1234says...

- 2 cheap injkets
- second $300 + $100warranty inkjet which it seemed would have 'ink head' go bad regardless of whether i printer stuff often or a monthly basis. A million visits to futureshop (under extended warranty) and same shit again and again. Just would not print what and when i wanted it.
-screw it $500 industrial sized laser ftw.

This is exaclty why i went out to a mom and pop printer store, and bought a laser printer. Not just any printer, after telling them about my horrible experiences with tons of inkjets, they sold me the very laser printer they had hooker up as their store printer. It was 500 bucks, a lot more than the cheapests laser printers, and it can print a bajillion more pages per minute than i need, but damn has that thing been reliable.

Mashikisays...

>> ^r10k:

325MB for a fucking printer driver?

Now that's funny... the old CD sized HP printer driver. I can't begin to imagine how they pulled that one off.


That's not the driver. It's the software with the driver which is all bloat. If you look at any printer driver, they're about 380k-3mb in size packed, including DLL's still. You can still install them without all the crap as well, you just need to know how.

Generally it's /drivers/printerX2000000000models/InsertOShere/

I have 3 computers here, all running different versions of windows(XP,XP64 and RC of Win7) they all work perfectly with just the basic driver install. And in Win7's case none of my printers needed a driver install at all, just locate on the network.

Xaxsays...

>> ^videosiftbannedme:
325MB for a fucking printer driver? Are you high?
Yeah...I do tech for living, can't ya tell?


Er, not really. As Mashiki says, that's the whole software suite, likely the entire contents of the CD that came with the printer. The driver itself would be significantly smaller, and with HP at least, is always available as a separate download.

videosiftbannedmesays...

>> ^Mashiki:
>> ^r10k:

325MB for a fucking printer driver?

Now that's funny... the old CD sized HP printer driver. I can't begin to imagine how they pulled that one off.

That's not the driver. It's the software with the driver which is all bloat. If you look at any printer driver, they're about 380k-3mb in size packed, including DLL's still. You can still install them without all the crap as well, you just need to know how.
Generally it's /drivers/printerX2000000000models/InsertOShere/
I have 3 computers here, all running different versions of windows(XP,XP64 and RC of Win7) they all work perfectly with just the basic driver install. And in Win7's case none of my printers needed a driver install at all, just locate on the network.



Oh trust me, I know you can download just the printer drivers sans bloat. But try explaining that to an end-user who then complains when their inkjet doesn't start telling them to replace the ink cartridge, etc, etc (whine) because so-and-so's computer does it (/whine). You can't reason with someone who doesn't have the capacity to begin with. It's easier to just humor the sheep.

Mashikisays...

>> ^videosiftbannedme:
But try explaining that to an end-user who then complains when their inkjet doesn't start telling them to replace the ink cartridge, etc, etc (whine) because so-and-so's computer does it (/whine). You can't reason with someone who doesn't have the capacity to begin with. It's easier to just humor the sheep.

The last epson I installed I thought I'd be creative and see if there was a solution to that. Just google "inklevel" there's two different chunks of software out there, one for macs another for PC's that will do that across networks even. And weigh in at a hefty 1.3mb, and support HP, Epson and Cannon printers.

If you're using lexmark you need to be shot anyway.

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