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NMA: Kim Jong-il turns 69 in style.

submitted by ant

1 decade 3 years 2 months 2 weeks ago

"North Korea's Dear Leader officially turns 69 this week (Russian records says he's 70). Kim Jong-il's birthday is a major holiday in North Korea, where the national cult of personality attributes to him godlike powers, such as being able to alter the weather with his thoughts and not having to urinate or defecate. According to Pyongyang propaganda, when Kim was born, allegedly in a log cabin on the sacred Mount Baekdu (he was actually born in Siberia), winter turned to spring and a double rainbow and star appeared in the sky. Kim is also said to have shot a 38 under par and hit 11 holes-in-one the first time he played golf.
Before succeeding his father as dictator, Kim was an avid film buff. According to some reports, he likes Rambo movies and once possessed the world's largest private collection of Daffy Duck cartoons. Kim orchestrated the kidnapping of a South Korean film director and his actress wife and forced them to make movies for him, among them the Godzilla rip-off Pulgasari.
Pulgasari is so bad it's good ... Unfortunately, one magical power Kim Jong-il does not seem to possess is the ability to prevent his country from going to hell — though he does have nuclear weapons.
The man also is reported to consume more Hennessy VSOP than anyone else in the world."